Tuesday 22 March 2011

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Your Neighbour.

Interaction With Your Close-Door Neighbour.

A Neighbour is a person who leaves close to you. Not everyone care about their relationship with a close-door neighbour. Nevertheless, it’s a healthy practice have a balance and smooth relationship with your neighbour most especially when you have kids.

When you foster resentment within yourself for others, then others will in turn do the same to you. In a nutshell, creating and establishing a good relationship with our neighbour is very important in our well-being, we cannot depend on the desire to separate ourselves from society and the world in general.When we do so it will affect us negatively.

Let your relation with your neighbour be moderate and with a sincere heart. One may ask if it necessary to have a healthy relationship with my close-door neighbour. Yes it is vital. For the following reasons;

  • Consider your kids, once in a while they move around at the same time pump into your neighbours' apartment. His reception towards the kids will be determined based on your relationship with him.
  • You may be face with danger and may need a help from your next door neighbour. What will you do if you have unhealthy interaction?
  • Your child became seriously ill at the odd hour of the day and your spouse is not at home. How do you manage the situation?
  • If you are face with Pregnancy Labour and your spouse is not at home. What do you do?
There are so many reasons why you should maintain a good relationship with your next door neighbour. If your neighbour is the difficult type.This is what you should do:

Greeting:  Always be the first to greet or wish, when you meet your neighbour during the day.
Smile: It wins the hearts of many in a moment. If apply properly it works. Smile strengthens the bond between two hearts.It is a universal truth. Whenever you see your neighbour just pass a sweet smile and wave your hand. 
Note:- do not laugh at your neighbour. Help:You are free to extend a helping hand to your neighbour at all time.
Appreciation: Show appreciation to your neighbour whenever there is reason for it.
Family Invitation: Whenever you organize a family function you can invite your neighbour and even ask him to help.
Listen: Give listening ear to your neighbour when he is speaking on his favourite topic, do not show how boring his topics makes you feel.For, everyone loves to be listened.
Argue: Never argue with your neighbour for it could lead to quarrel.
Avoid borrowing: Be contented with what you have.
Gossip: This is a deadly weapon that destroys relationship, beware of it. Do not gossips when you are with you neighbour.
Finally as a woman it is advice to be friendly and polite to your neighbour.
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Wednesday 16 March 2011

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Kids.

How well you should know your kids!

Children are fruit of the womb which is a gift from God. How will manage this gift while with us indicate the levels of appreciation to God.

Mothers have a very vital role to play in the lives of their kids, because they are the role model of their kids. When a mother fails to provide her child with the essential habit and moral values it need, then it is most likely the child will not develop into it full potentials.
It is up to mothers to teach their kids True Love, the Values of Lives when the kids are still tender and fragile. For it will be a very difficult task to re-shape the character when it's confirmed and hardened with years. King Solomon in his famous speech "train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it" (Proverb 22:6). This is a true saying.

It is very important for every mother to know who really is their child, what is his/her interest, know his weakness and challenges, help in developing their talent and find out who their friends are, and get to know where they leave etc.

Create time to talk with your kids, find out what they are thinking? The responds may surprise you. The best way to know you child is to listen more and speak less. Allow your child to direct in the conversation and give advice where necessary. Give your advice without being judgmental or critical. Be an active listener this will help you get more information from your child and you will be able to help your child understand how their choices and decisions affect their lives and direct them to a healthier and better steps to follow.

Ask few detail questions that will create meaningful conversation. Short answers question such as what is your math teacher's name? is of no effect when you really want to know who your child is. You may ask your child what he or she feels about the math teacher, or what they feel about our family. Do not judge their responds but give corrections where an odd words is been used. Be natural to your kids and they will in turn be completely free and open to you.

During the process of knowing who your kids are, there are so many things to teach them, but I will only mention four things.
  • To love God 
  • To appreciate the importance and value of family relationship 
  • To appreciate the help of others and 
  • To be a team player.
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Thursday 3 March 2011

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Your Spouse.

Relationship With Your Spouse.

Relationship with your spouse has to do with your partner in marriage. Since this is a woman forum we are now making reference to the male spouse, that is, relationship with your husband. Is it a healthy or are you struggling to keep it going? No doubt there is bound to be conflict when you change the rules in a relationship. It's okay. Conflict most time makes relationship to grow. Through conflict two people can create a deeper understanding of one another and develop a stronger bond. It is very important to be in harmony with your spouse.

Here are some steps to follow in building a stronger and sound relationship with your spouse. All you need to do is put them into practices and score yourself after three months.

Prayer: The efficacy of prayer cannot be over emphasizing. Always seek for God's grace over your relationship with your spouse.

Communication: No matter how busy you may be create out time to talk to spouse, let your husband know how you feel about him; there are so many things to talk about. Do not use silence as a weapon when you are hurt by your spouse. It is better you voice out your resentments in a way that can be heard, acknowledge and resolved. It is better to deal with problems early and honestly than to let them pile up in silence until an explosion occurs. To experience a satisfying and enriching relationship with your spouse, communication lines need to be maintained for ultimate interpersonal satisfaction. Effective and Positive communication help relationships to grow.

Submissive: As a wife you have to know that the man is the head of the house. It does not mean you have to yield to his unreasonable desires all in the name of submission. Let your submission be in line with the principles of God. Submissions to your male spouse do not mean violation of your dignity as a human being.

Do not take your spouse for granted:Do not take your male spouse for a ride. Be polite at all time. Even when you want him to assist you in doing some house core, approach him with love and respect.

Respect your spouse: This is a very vita spice in relationship. You need to respect your husband, no matter your level, status, wealth; you can never be the head of the house. That is the way God has arranged it. Respect your spouse at all time, most especially when you are in public with him. It boosts up his confidence and makes most men feel on top.

Assumption: Avoid mind-Reading. Always assuming and jumping into conclusion is certainly not the best. Not just when you saw a lady in your husband's car, oh! You assumed that must be his mistress. Take time to hear from your spouse before jumping into conclusion.

Thankful: Not everyone knows how to show appreciation or be grateful at every kind gesture done to them. Sometimes you may not like the gift presented to you by your male spouse, the best thing to do is to collect it and thank him couple it with hug and kiss them you can politely make your comment. There is an adage in Igbo part of Nigeria that say "Etoo dike na nke omere omekwaa ozo" means when you praise a mighty man for what he has done, he will do more.

Honesty: It will cost you nothing to be truthful or sincere or plain to your husband but dishonesty can destroy your home. You do not need to buy truth, say it the way it is. In nutshell be yourself.

Food: A way to a man's heart is his meal, if you do not know how to cook, find a way to learn it. Here is some website that teaches on how to prepare meal.


Patience: This is a great virtue. You need it especially when you are faced with long time difficulties. When you are provoked by your male spouse you need to persevere, even when he used negative word son you endure do not respond because yours might lead to negative reaction from him. You can sought it out later.

Forgiveness: Let go of all grudges and bitterness. Find it in your heart to forgive your man, most especially when he says"my princess, I'm sorry". Do not bear grudges for it might affect your health negatively.

Housekeeping/Personal Hygiene: Keep your environment free form dirt. Make the house conducive for your family. Keep your body clean. Remove the hair in your armpit regular, let your hair, nails, teeth, feet, hand and skin be free from dirt. Menstrual hygiene is very important. Clean after urinating. By so doing you will be free from body odour.

Mind your Friends: Who are your friends? What do they do for a living? How good is their relationship with their husbands? Is their advice to you positive or negative? Do they engage you in competition (fashion or get the latest car or house)? Is she of a questionable character? Most husbands are worried over the kind of friends their wives keeps and some have gone further to stop their wives in have anything to do with them. So be wise.

Blaming: Always say it's my fault when something goes wrong. And ask how do we solve it? I tell you, you will be surprise at your husband’s responds. Try as much as you can to avoid blame. Already the person at fault is guilty and is battling over it within his mind; you don’t need to add salt into injury.

Cheerful: Keep a smiling face to your man and also extend it to his extended family and friends. He will be so enthusiastic to take you out always.

Be wise and enjoy your relationship.

Always feel free to share your problem, we are here for you.
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